![]() "We had players that came to camps, wore the kit and played for England, but outside of that, didn't really publicise that ," he says. He says that, in some cases, the transition has been so taxing that players have been reluctant to publicly highlight their Para-athlete status, recalling a number of past squad members who neglected to mention their England call-ups on social media. "With somebody like Matt, he's changing how he lives his life," Barker explained. ![]() Barker says that 'career termination', which, in Crossen's case, involved the end of his time in the semi-professional game and the beginning of his Para-football career, can have significant long-term effects on a player's state of mind. "You're worrying, 'am I going to be good enough, am I going to fit in?'" England's cerebral palsy team are ranked fourth in the worldĬrossen's trepidation was familiar to Dr Jamie Barker, England's Para-football psychologist for the past 10 years. "Travelling to my first camp was more mentally draining than the sessions," he said. ![]() ![]() But his psychological battle was far from over. The head of England's Para-football team heard about his stroke and offered the Teesside-born playmaker a trial.Ī year after learning to walk again, Crossen was about to taste international football for the first time. "I've always been of the thought that everything happens for a reason, so that's how I saw it."Ĭrossen's devotion reaped almost immediate dividends. "I'd spoken to the doctor and the surgeon about my head, where the clot was, and I just thought, 'right, if it's a freak incident, my body is in good condition, I'll just focus on football and that's it'. "I wasn't even thinking, 'Can it happen again?' or 'What happens next?' Football was the only thing that was in my head. "That's the only thing that was in my mind," he said, reflecting on his stay in hospital. For him, there was one goal: playing football. The England captain says a clear-eyed focus was crucial to the pace of his recovery. I was all over the place," joked Crossen. "I was doing a spin class, trying to get my legs and co-ordination going. Remarkably, just a month and a half later, he was back in the gym, preparing to play. His return to the pitch - in any form of the game - was far from a foregone conclusion.ĭuring a six-day stay in hospital, Crossen had to learn to walk, read and write again. The midfielder had already racked up 16 games playing for Northern League side Marske United in the ninth tier of English football when his stroke struck. According to Crossen, doctors who ran tests after the stroke were left so puzzled, they were interested in examining the incident as part of a medical study. "I completely lost all feeling and it felt like my arm was right in the air, even though I had it across my chest that's how weird it was," he said. Ten years ago, while speaking to students at a local college, he suffered a stroke that paralysed the left side of his body. "The pressure that we're going to feel isn't going to kill you: it's just something that you should be thriving off."Ĭrossen's perspective is driven by painful experience. "I kept saying to the lads throughout the tournament, 'pressure is a privilege'," he told BBC Sport. Crossen, England's captain for the past six years, is one. The smaller-sided games arguably place an even greater emphasis on the main protagonists. Cerebral palsy teams are made up of seven players, one of a number of adaptations to aid athletes dealing with neurological impairments. And forget images of 11 players waiting pensively for penalties: England only have seven men on the pitch.įortunately, this is less to do with breaking rules than it is abiding by the laws of the game. This is Sicily six months ago, the setting of the cerebral palsy Euros final. It's a scene eerily familiar to any English football fan: the latter stages of a knockout tournament, hopes riding high and a formidable foe lying in wait.Įxcept this isn't Wembley in 1996 or 2021. This is the story of that transformation, from the trauma of paralysis to a tilt at a title that continues to elude England's men's teams across all forms of the game: the European Championship. The physical impact of the incident is only one half of the story, though.Ĭrossen's journey from highly rated youngster to the top of the 'para' game, encompassing impairments ranging from partial sight to cerebral palsy, has also been a mental battle.įrom dealing with dashed dreams of becoming a professional footballer to embracing his Para-athlete status, Crossen, 34, has undergone a life-changing switch of identities. Ten years on, the former semi-professional - who now captains England's cerebral palsy team - still suffers from pins and needles which sweep the left side of his body. "There was something inside me which meant I knew straight away I was going to get back to football: I just knew it," he said.
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